We all have been in at least one relationship where we thought it is meant to be and will definitely stand the test of time but we saw that crumble right in front of us. The best of the best relationship sometimes have an expiry date. In the present scenario, I am seeing couples break up so swiftly that it is becoming harder to think about a stable lovable relationship in our lives. I pondered on the topic that what could be the reasons that couples are breaking up so fast and came up with the following reasons.
LOW SELF ESTEEM
You can rule the world if you are confident about your abilities. Still doubt whether this trait is influential or not in a relationship? Well! In all means if you aren’t confident about your abilities and you constantly struggle with your self-esteem, it will reflect on the endurance of your relationship. It is very hard to cope with a person who is always in self-doubt and doesn’t value himself or herself. If you are one such person, you need to know that your partner will eventually get tired of playing the support system. Everyone deserves somebody who has self-regard and assurance. Else, it is nothing more than raising a toddler.
Bad habits like always being under the influence, a bad hygiene or not being responsible is troublesome for the durability of any relationship. If the partners aren’t working towards attaining growth in each other’s lives which means getting rid of the bad habits and transforming into better personalities, it is actually not worth it. A relationship should help two persons grow into better ones. Recently, one of my friends broke up with her boyfriend because he disregarded that she did not like him smoke while in the car. I think that was a good enough reason to breakup. Smoking is not just bad for health, smoking while your partner is opposing is hurting their sense of being. So, possessing bad habit and not doing anything about it is also a prime reason for breakup these days.
Some people are very dominating in nature. They like to boss around and keep things completely under their control. When this nature of a person starts reflecting in his/her relationship, the bond suffers. When a person starts to feel that his voice isn’t being heard by the partner and he single handedly has to make all the sacrifices and compromises, the relationship will slowly begin to fade away and breakup will be waiting for you.
“Opposites attract” but does that attraction sustain? Not necessarily, right? Incompatibility is a serious problem in a relationship and it is very problematic for peace. When two people have entirely different nature, co-existing becomes very difficult. Incompatible partners will always have conflicting opinions and reaching to agreements is a nearly impossible task.
LACK OF SOCIALIZATION
When a partner demands total time and attention every single day, things start getting claustrophobic. When the relationship two people share doesn’t allow them to meet new people and open the doors of exploration, it becomes suffocating. When you have to sacrifice your social circle just to be that one person, things take a bad turn and come to end eventually.
VARIOUS FORMS OF ABUSE
Whether verbal, physical or mental, every form of abusive is dreadfully destructive for a relationship. The fast paced and rapidly growing age that we live in today, mechanizes us to be very short tempered and impatient. Sometimes it even is the displaced anger of a person that tags along the storm in a relationship and once you have invited the storm, can you stop the rain? Hence, a lot of relationships meet their ending when things begin to get cruelly deteriorating.
When partners aren’t financially sound, the problems get bigger and bigger. Your financial priorities become relationship priorities. People ignore finances before dating as they enter into relationship with an agenda that love can conquer anything. But if you ask your sensibilities, it will answer that love does need a roof over his head and good place to hang out, gifts and surprises etc. etc. You will be fooling yourself if you think that money doesn’t matter. It does matter!
LACK OF EMPATHY
Empathy is a very important feeling that helps two people grow fonder and better. Every partner must have the ability to share each other’s emotions and understand it thoroughly. A lack of empathy is a major character trait that leads to an unfulfilling relationship wherein you feel lonely and frustrated all the time.
TENDENCY OF CONSTANT NAGGING
Nobody gets into a relationship to be pin pointed all the time about their wrong doings. Constant naggers are a major turn off and their partners are likely to get fed up of them very soon. Nagging kills the joy of a relationship and sometimes it is offending also. So, in a relationship where one has a habit of henpecking, thing will begin to mortify and finish.
Materialism is toxic and too much of it can turn a great bond into a strangled one. Love is emotions that spiritually uplifts people and when materialism drives into a relationship, it brings the merry go round to a halt. Physical comfort and materialistic possessions becomes top priority and a tendency of devaluing human sentiments and spiritual values is developed. Gradually, this suffocates a relationship and people part ways.
Several studies have been conducted lately that have come up with a conclusion that habitual lying is one of the most prominent reasons for breakup these days and a lot of people are engaged in it. It is next to impossible to get a compulsive liar admit his or her fault. When a partner starts lying and starts finding comfort in it, things get messed up. Compulsive liars enjoy the thrill of getting away with it and the attention they get in return. Once the other half realizes about this habit, he/she rather will take a step back than to be with a compulsive liar.
Comparisons are anyhow not good for a relationship as it shows that your partner isn’t proud of you. Making odd comparisons like ‘you aren’t as successful or handsome like my best friend’s boyfriend’ ‘You never took me on a date like my ex did’ ‘You don’t have as good dressing sense as mine’ indicates that the person is not regardful of your charm and presence and most importantly, is not happy about you.
The hectic work culture of this century is dreadful for relationships but as it is rightly said ‘It’s all about priorities’. You just have to be a little smart and giving to save your relationship from time constraint issues. The time that you have, even if it is the minimum, if you give your partner full attention during that, the person will be happy and content. But the problem is that most people fail to do that. Less attention to the partner and the partner will indeed foster feeling of being left out.
What people fail to understand is that nobody is perfect and that our partners cannot possess each and every quality that we dreamt of. Just like us, they too have flaws. Instead, what people do is engage in either emotional or physical infidelity. They begin discussing their relationship problem with their affair whereas they should be discussing it with their partner. This creates the chaos and the fate of such relationship is a breakup.
According to me, there isn’t a robust and better medicine than strong communication between the partners. When communication begins to get affected and is poor, problems start piling up. A lot is left unsaid and partners start developing grudges against one another. Poor communication, hence, becomes one of the main reasons for breakup.
So, these were 15 major reasons why couples are breaking up so fast these days. So many relationships can be saved if the partners are willing to make small changes in their personalities. If only they understood that in the battle of egos, the looser always wins!